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ficlet: Persistence - athene
deinonychus_1
deinonychus_1
ficlet: Persistence

Title: Persistence
Author: Athene
Fandom: Primeval
Pairing/characters: Connor, Cutter.
Rating: PG
Warnings: AU from the end of series 1, rather dark theme. 
Spoilers: 1.6. 
Disclaimer: Not mine. ITV and Impossible Pictures own them.
Word count: approx 280
Summary: What if Connor hadn’t believed Cutter in 2.1? What if no-one had believed him? 
AN: Originally written last year for the Primeval100 challenge, ‘Who’s Claudia?’, but it turned out that 100 words just wasn’t enough to say what I wanted this fic to say. Thanks to Fredbassett for the beta, and for poking me to dust off some fic that has been languishing on my hard drive.

            Connor hated this place. Calling it a hospital didn’t change what it was – an asylum, a madhouse, a prison. The only things that kept him coming back were his sense of friendship and respect. And guilt.

“Professor?” Connor was the only one who still called him that.

            Cutter looked up from his drawing. Always the same drawing, always the future predator, even after all these years.

That was when they had started to lose him. That was when he had started to talk about things that had never happened, and people who had never existed. And after what had happened with Stephen… No, even after that, no one could have predicted the breakdown.

Connor couldn’t help but wonder if there had been signs, if there had been a critical point where they might have been able to stop it. If there had been anything that he, that any of them, could have done. 

            Cutter looked up at him, and smiled. “Connor.”

            Connor’s heart leapt at the rare moment of recognition. Maybe this was one of Cutter’s better days. Connor had long since given up hope of ‘better’ ever being close to ‘normal’. Nick Cutter, the real Nick Cutter, had died a long time ago, and had left in his place this man who simply wore Cutter’s body, and talked with his accent.

            Cutter leaned towards him, his eyes alight with hope. “Have you found Claudia yet?”

            Connor’s heart broke all over again, and he tried to hide the disappointment. Tried to talk around the sudden solid mass of pain in his throat.

“No, Professor.”

            Cutter looked faintly annoyed and returned to his drawing.

            Of all his delusions, ‘Claudia Brown’ was still the most persistent.

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36 comments or Leave a comment
Comments
fififolle From: fififolle Date: July 29th, 2008 09:37 pm (UTC) (Link)
Oh. That's heartbreaking. Deary me. Very well done.
deinonychus_1 From: deinonychus_1 Date: July 29th, 2008 10:07 pm (UTC) (Link)
Thanks. It was a bit dark and angsty, wasn't it?
reggietate From: reggietate Date: July 29th, 2008 10:01 pm (UTC) (Link)
Oh, ow! That's a real little killer. Brilliant fic, packing such a punch into so few words.
deinonychus_1 From: deinonychus_1 Date: July 29th, 2008 10:10 pm (UTC) (Link)
Thanks, I'm glad it works. It's been sitting on my hard drive since last year, because I was never quite certain whether to post it, or whether it was just too dark and AU for people's tastes in this fandom.
lukadreaming From: lukadreaming Date: July 29th, 2008 10:23 pm (UTC) (Link)
Snivel. I think dark may be an understatement! This is a wonderful piece of writing, and I'm glad Fred jabbed you hard in the ribs to get it posted.
deinonychus_1 From: deinonychus_1 Date: July 30th, 2008 01:40 am (UTC) (Link)
Thanks. I'm not sure where the idea for this came from, or why I felt the need to write something quite this dark. To be honest, when I'm *reading* I sometimes love to see a happy, fluffy adventure where the boy gets the girl (or the other pretty boy) and they all live happily ever after. But when I'm writing I do things like this. I'm sure a phychologist would have a field day with most fic writers.
mysteriousaliwz From: mysteriousaliwz Date: July 29th, 2008 11:44 pm (UTC) (Link)
Ouch!
Poor Nick ...
deinonychus_1 From: deinonychus_1 Date: July 30th, 2008 01:47 am (UTC) (Link)
Indeed. *huggles Nick and promises to write fluffy Nick fic at some point to make up for this one*
bigtitch From: bigtitch Date: July 30th, 2008 06:41 am (UTC) (Link)
*meep*
*whimper*
Poor Nick.
Great fic.
deinonychus_1 From: deinonychus_1 Date: July 30th, 2008 04:58 pm (UTC) (Link)
Thanks. I'm mean to the poor boys occasionally.
fredbassett From: fredbassett Date: July 30th, 2008 11:02 am (UTC) (Link)
It's harsh and painful and so bloody sad. But that's not a reason to avid posting good fic, and this is definitely good, no doubt about that. It packs a punch and the ending is great.

*sniffles*
deinonychus_1 From: deinonychus_1 Date: July 30th, 2008 05:00 pm (UTC) (Link)
Thanks again for the beta. I noticed after I'd posted this that this week's drabble challenge is an open past prompt one. I'm feeling guilty for not having done any drabbles for a while, so may have to see if I can find something to inspire me.
telperion_15 From: telperion_15 Date: July 30th, 2008 07:48 pm (UTC) (Link)
*cries* Ouch, this hurts... I've developed this rather protective attitude towards Nick and Connor over the past few months, and it's painful to see both of them in this situation.

I think we all like the darker stuff, so long as we know we can come out into the light afterwards.
deinonychus_1 From: deinonychus_1 Date: July 30th, 2008 09:32 pm (UTC) (Link)
*hugs* Sorry about this one, I'll try not to hurt the boys again for a while. Probably.

I wrote this ages ago, before S2 even aired with all its lovely Nick/Connor slashyness. And I really have no idea where the bunny came from. Just kind of a 'what if...' scenario.

I can see why you'd be protective - they're just too cute together.
daxie42 From: daxie42 Date: May 25th, 2009 03:42 am (UTC) (Link)
Awwwwww poor Nick, poor Connor. You explained Nick's desent into madness well and it would be just like Connor to continue visiting him - this was really heartbreaking :(
deinonychus_1 From: deinonychus_1 Date: May 25th, 2009 09:07 am (UTC) (Link)
I wrote this before series 2 aired, because I wanted to play with the idea of how the changed timeline would affect Nick. I think I was disapointed with how little they actually they actually addressed that issue in the show itself when S2 finally came along. But of all of them, I think Connor would be the one who remained loyal to Nick and kept visitng, despite how much it hurt to see Nick like that.
echo_fangirl From: echo_fangirl Date: June 21st, 2009 10:17 am (UTC) (Link)
Oh, ouch! I could absolutely see this happening... Doesn't make it any less heartbreaking though. :(
deinonychus_1 From: deinonychus_1 Date: June 21st, 2009 05:36 pm (UTC) (Link)
you seem to be homing in on all the most angsty fics in my list! But who can resist the boys when they're broken and angsty? Glad you liked (for a given definition of 'liked' *evil grin*)
knitekat From: knitekat Date: August 15th, 2009 09:45 pm (UTC) (Link)
Oh that is sad, but it is a great fic. Poor Nick. Poor Connor.
deinonychus_1 From: deinonychus_1 Date: August 16th, 2009 04:26 pm (UTC) (Link)
thanks. I got bitten by that very dark bunny and it just wouldn't leave me alone until I'd written that one.
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