?

Log in

No account? Create an account
entries friends calendar profile Previous Previous Next Next
Fanfic: Three Words - athene
deinonychus_1
deinonychus_1
Fanfic: Three Words

Primeval fandom has finally made it onto my trope bingo card!!! Yey! Kind of ironic it's taken this long, considering the primary reason why I signed up to it was in the hope of prompting some Primeval bunnies, but better late to the party than never!

Title: Three Words
Author: Athene
Fandom: Primeval
Pairing/characters: Becker
Rating: 15
Warnings: Occasional language, canon character death mentioned
Spoilers: General series 3, webisodes
Disclaimer: Not mine. ITV and Impossible Pictures own them.
Word count: approx 578
Summary: Becker couldn’t even bring himself to read the report.
AN: Fills the trope bingo square ‘presumed dead’.



Missing, presumed dead.

Three words, three lives, three marks of his failure.

Becker couldn’t even bring himself to read the report. What would it tell him that he didn’t already know? That the higher ups had lost confidence in the ARC team. That they would not authorise any further search and rescue missions. That they had given up on the impossible possibility that Danny, Connor and Abby were still out there somewhere, still trying to get home, still hoping that they had a home to come back to.

It had only been five months, and already they had been written off. Becker wanted to be shocked by the narrow-mindedness of the authorities, but in all honestly he wasn’t. They had no fucking clue what it was like doing this job, what the anomalies and the past and the future worlds were really like. Five months, though?

Helen Cutter had survived for eight bloody years, and she had been on her own. And yet it had been decided by some fucking idiot in a suit and a nice safe office that Danny, Connor and Abby couldn’t survive for five months. Connor, an expert on dinosaurs and the past, Abby, an expert in tracking and animal behaviour, and Danny, expert in whatever the hell he needed to be, and beloved of Lady Luck herself. If anyone could survive out there, it would be those three.

Missing, presumed dead.

Becker couldn’t believe it. Wouldn’t believe it, not until he saw their bodies. And he knew exactly how futile that resolution was, because the chance of finding their bodies in the vastness of time was even more remote than the chance of them all strolling through the very next anomaly, Danny grinning and making some quip about whether or not Becker had missed him.

Becker closed his eyes. God, he could see it happening just like that. Connor and Abby hugging each other, and maybe even him as well. Danny smirking and pretending that he cared far less than they all knew he really did. Becker pretending he didn’t care at all, when everyone knew that was the biggest bloody lie ever.

Sometimes he wished he didn’t care. Sometimes he remembered the days when they were nothing more than scientists. Annoying, naive, creature-loving scientists with no sense of self-preservation and no respect at all for what little chain of command actually existed at the ARC. When protecting them was nothing more than a job, his latest posting on his way through the military hierarchy as he did his damndest to prove himself to everyone. Well, that hadn’t worked out so great, had it? Damn near everyone he had been sent here to protect was either presumed dead or actually dead.

Sarah. God, Sarah. If only he had known. If he had stopped for even five minutes and thought about it. If he had spent more fucking time actually protecting the one person who was still here for him to protect, instead of blindly chasing after the ones who he had already failed.

Becker opened his eyes. The screen was still there, too bright in the darkness of his office. The words still mocked him and his futile resolutions. Three words that summed up his failure in the most clinical, efficient, and detached manner possible.

He blinked, and the words were gone for the briefest moment. He blinked again, allowing a single tear to escape.

Three words.

Becker only needed two.

“I’m sorry.”



Tags: , , ,

26 comments or Leave a comment
Comments
knitekat From: knitekat Date: October 25th, 2013 09:25 pm (UTC) (Link)
*hugs Becker* Lovely missing scene.
deinonychus_1 From: deinonychus_1 Date: October 26th, 2013 06:14 pm (UTC) (Link)
Thanks. I think Becker needs that hug.
eriah211 From: eriah211 Date: October 25th, 2013 09:35 pm (UTC) (Link)
Terribly angsty and touching, I love it. Poor, poor Becker! *hugs*
deinonychus_1 From: deinonychus_1 Date: October 26th, 2013 06:15 pm (UTC) (Link)
Thanks. Poor Becker and his angst and guilt.
clea2011 From: clea2011 Date: October 25th, 2013 10:16 pm (UTC) (Link)
Poor Becker! That was beautifully written, but poor Becker!
deinonychus_1 From: deinonychus_1 Date: October 26th, 2013 06:16 pm (UTC) (Link)
Thanks! I know, I'm horrible to him, but he does angst so very well.
cordeliadelayne From: cordeliadelayne Date: October 26th, 2013 12:48 am (UTC) (Link)
Oh, meep, poor Becker.
deinonychus_1 From: deinonychus_1 Date: October 26th, 2013 06:16 pm (UTC) (Link)
Thanks. Poor Becker and his guilt.
aunteeneenah From: aunteeneenah Date: October 26th, 2013 03:16 am (UTC) (Link)
Poor Becker. How this must have hung over him. Very well written. **ladylike sniffle**
deinonychus_1 From: deinonychus_1 Date: October 26th, 2013 06:17 pm (UTC) (Link)
Thanks. He does angst blame himself for so much, even when there isn't anything he could have done to prevent it, poor baby.
bigtitch From: bigtitch Date: October 26th, 2013 05:44 am (UTC) (Link)
*hugs Becker*
poor thing.
deinonychus_1 From: deinonychus_1 Date: October 26th, 2013 06:17 pm (UTC) (Link)
Thanks. He really needs that hug!
pinkcat4569 From: pinkcat4569 Date: October 26th, 2013 06:34 am (UTC) (Link)
I have three words, "I need chocolate." That was so sad!
deinonychus_1 From: deinonychus_1 Date: October 26th, 2013 06:17 pm (UTC) (Link)
Thanks! Poor Becker and his angst.
snowdrop3100 From: snowdrop3100 Date: October 26th, 2013 09:08 am (UTC) (Link)
Awww, poor Becker.
Hang in there honey, it will get better (at least in the getting Connor and Abby back-department ;)).

Thank you for writing and sharing.
deinonychus_1 From: deinonychus_1 Date: October 26th, 2013 06:18 pm (UTC) (Link)
Thanks! He just looked so lost and angsty until Connor and Abby came back, bless him.
dreamer_98 From: dreamer_98 Date: October 27th, 2013 03:24 am (UTC) (Link)
Heartbreaking and evocative. Very nicely done.
deinonychus_1 From: deinonychus_1 Date: October 27th, 2013 06:55 pm (UTC) (Link)
Thanks. Poor Becker, he does angst so beautifully.
fredbassett From: fredbassett Date: October 27th, 2013 01:10 pm (UTC) (Link)
Ouch, poor Becker, and poor Sarah!
deinonychus_1 From: deinonychus_1 Date: October 27th, 2013 06:56 pm (UTC) (Link)
Thanks. Poor Becker, the 'presumed dead' square was just made for Becker angst.
fififolle From: fififolle Date: October 27th, 2013 02:43 pm (UTC) (Link)
Oh, poor, poor Becker. *huggles him*
Hang in there, sweetie, it will be a little better soon.
Great fic.
deinonychus_1 From: deinonychus_1 Date: October 27th, 2013 06:57 pm (UTC) (Link)
Thanks. Poor Becker, he needs lots of hugs because he's all sad and angsty.
stealingpennies From: stealingpennies Date: October 28th, 2013 01:25 pm (UTC) (Link)

Poor, poor Becker. This is my absolute favourite moment ever for Becker angst and he really does beat himself raw over his failures. (So very nicely!!)

The para about Sarah is especially poignant because, yes, she still was there to be protected.
deinonychus_1 From: deinonychus_1 Date: October 28th, 2013 07:06 pm (UTC) (Link)
In the webisodes and at the start of series 4, Becker had such a huge angsty guilt thing going on, poor baby. He is just perfect for writing angst fic at that point.
lsellersfic From: lsellersfic Date: November 3rd, 2013 08:02 pm (UTC) (Link)
Poor angst-ridden Becker, but you do write him well!
deinonychus_1 From: deinonychus_1 Date: November 4th, 2013 09:25 pm (UTC) (Link)
Thanks! Poor Becker, he is just made for angst in that gap between series 3 and 4.
26 comments or Leave a comment